Self-esteem, self-confidence & self-worth
Insecurity, harsh self-criticism, perfectionism and the sense of not being enough no matter what you achieve. We work with what your body expects from other people, not only with what you believe about yourself.
Worth is a felt experience, not an argument
Many people can list their strengths and still not feel them. That gap is not a lack of insight, it is the difference between what you know and what your body expects. If your system learned to anticipate criticism, rejection or conditional approval, it keeps preparing for it regardless of the evidence.
So we do not work on convincing you of your value. We work on the bracing, monitoring and shrinking that happen underneath, until being yourself in front of others requires less defence.
What this often looks like
- Feeling insecure, or struggling with self-confidence
- Perfectionism, self-criticism and harsh inner commentary
- Feeling like an impostor, or waiting to be found out
- Shrinking in groups, at work, or around certain people
- Difficulty receiving praise, care or good things
- A persistent sense of not being enough, regardless of what you achieve
How we work with it
We get to know the critic rather than fighting it. Self-criticism is almost always trying to protect you from something, humiliation, rejection, being unprepared. When its job becomes clear, it tends to relax without needing to be defeated.
We practise being seen in small doses. Worth is relational, so part of the work happens in the room: noticing what happens in you when someone stays attentive and does not withdraw.
We build capacity to receive. Many people find good things harder to tolerate than difficult ones. Learning to stay with warmth, praise or ease without deflecting is quietly transformative.
We let confidence follow contact. Rather than performing a more confident version of yourself, we work on being more genuinely in contact with yourself, from which steadiness tends to emerge on its own.
Practical details
Format
60-minute individual sessions, online or in person in Stockholm. Weekly or fortnightly to start.
First step
A free 15-minute introductory call. Length, fee and cancellation are set out on the Inside a session page.
Languages
English and Serbian / Croatian / Bosnian / Montenegrin.
Questions people ask me
Can confidence really change, or is it just my personality?
It can change. What we call low confidence is usually a set of learned protective responses, anticipating criticism, shrinking, over-preparing, rather than a fixed trait. Responses that were learned can be worked with.
Why doesn't positive thinking help me?
Because the belief is not held only in thought. Affirmations tend to bounce off a body that is braced for judgement. We work with that bracing directly and the sense of worth becomes something you feel rather than something you argue for.
My self-criticism is what makes me perform well. Will I lose that?
You will not lose your standards. Usually what changes is the cost: people find they can still care about doing things well without the constant threat of not being enough driving it.
I feel embarrassed talking about this. Is that normal?
Very. Shame is often the most guarded material, so we go slowly and only as far as feels workable. Nothing has to be exposed before you are ready.